Tenipuri Family
by xXnekuXx
Summary: Ryoma and Sakuno are siblings, Oishi became the maid while Tezuka and Fuji are the married couple and Ryoma and Sakuno's parents. Enter a random stranger passing by named Eiji. What will be the outcome?


**Disclaimer: I don't own POT. **

**Warning: OOC-ness, Alternate Universe, some words not suitable for young audience and this story is totally random **

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><p><strong>Tenipuri Family <strong>

Eiji is peacefully strolling around the streets of Tokyo until he saw this suspicious(not really) and noisy house. A thought popped in Eiji's mind thinking that the noise means having fun so he snuck in through the gates and spied the people living in the house.

"Sakuno, let's take a nap together in the children's room." Ryoma, a 6 year old brat, said to his younger sister Sakuno, who is 3 weeks younger than him. Oishi, the maid(butler) of the house heard this and smacked Ryoma with a feather duster. Ryoma coughed because of the dust from the feather duster.

"NO! No one shall enter this room until I finish cleaning it." _'You will never stay in one room with your sister and do something perverted, Echizen.' _Oishi thought clearly against Ryoma's perverted attitude towards his sister. Cleaning the children's room wasn't part of his job for the day and he only said that so Ryoma won't do something perverted. Ryoma glared at Oishi and went to cry to his mother.

"Kaa-san! Oishi is bullying me!" Ryoma fake cried.

"Gomen Ryoma, I can't talk at the mome-" Fuji, the mother of the household, was currently busy being scolded by Tezuka, the father of the household.

"Syuusuke! I thought I told you to do your job properly! The family won't be able to live if you slack off on your job! Run 50 laps around our house!" and Tezuka kept on lecturing and nagging preventing Fuji from running his(her) laps.

"Ryoma-niichan! Let's play together!" Sakuno came running towards Ryoma and yanked his arm wanting to play.

_'Since the children's room isn't available, we'll play in the parent's room!' _With that, Ryoma dragged Sakuno to the parent's room and locked the door. Oishi's ears twitched as he heard little steps going inside the parent's room and the soft click on the door and he immediately knew that they were Ryoma and Sakuno. His thoughts were confirmed when a random person with the name of Eiji barged inside the house through the window, breaking the glass and shouting.

"INCEST!" Eiji shouted.

"WHAT? And I even said Echizen can't stay in one room with his sister alone!" Oishi angrily stomped in the parent's room.

Tezuka and Fuji stopped their useless quarrel and stared at the random stranger and the broken window. Tezuka twitched and called Oishi, "Oi! Maid! Fix the window first and clean up the broken glass on the floor."

While Fuji asked the random stranger, "Who are you supposed to be?"

"A random stranger." Eiji blinked.

Tezuka, who was being ignored by the maid, got even more angry, "Useless maid! Didn't I order you to fix the window and clean up? Run 50 laps around the house!"

"Shouldn't we call the police? I mean a random stranger did barge in the house and even broke our window." Fuji suggested but the suggestion was left unanswered by Tezuka who was busy being angry with the maid. "Hey Mitsu! He's not listening."

Meanwhile with the maid and the children, Oishi banged on the parent's room with all his might.

"Open up the damn door Echizen!" Then, Oishi heard Tezuka's booming voice downstairs and muttered, "Stupid Tezuka worrying about the window and broken glass rather than his children who can do sex at any moment now."

Inside the room, two seemingly innocent children were thinking of what to play in the children's room.

"What are we gonna play, Ryoma-niichan?" Sakuno asked. Ryoma looked around the room then he opened the wardrobe and rummaged around the stuff there.

"This one!" Ryoma found a balloon look alike thing. But in reality, it was actually a condom. But they didn't know that so let's go with balloon.

"Oh! A balloon! Wow! This balloon is more stretchable than normal balloons. Ryoma-nicchan, blow it up for me!" Sakuno asked with her puppy eyes and Ryoma has no choice but to blow on the balloon, so he did.

"Wow cool!" They played with the 'balloon' until it popped. "What do we play now?"

"Hm, I know! I saw people on the TV doing it. The girl in the show even wanted to play it more. The girl in the show said, "MORE! FASTER! AHHHH~!"" Ryoma remembered after watching a random tape he found in the parent's room.

"Oh! How do you play it?" Sakuno innocently asked.

"Well the guy was on top and then there was this big and long thing coming from down here and then he put it in the girl's hole down there." Ryoma explained while pointing to where the big and long thing is supposed to be and also to where the girl's hole is supposed to be.

"What game is it called?"

"I think it was...secs."

"Let's try it!" After Sakuno said that, Ryoma went on top of Sakuno but then Eiji randomly crashed inside the parent's room via the window and sees Ryoma on top of Sakuno.

"INCEST!"

Outside, Oishi heard windows crashing and some random stranger shouting "INCEST!" from inside the parent's room. Oishi panicked, "What the heck is happening in there? That is it!" Oishi gets an ax out of nowhere and breaks down the door. "Wait, why didn't I think of this before?" Then he saw Ryoma on top of Sakuno.

"Fuck!" was Oishi's words. Tezuka and Fuji ran upstairs to the parent's room upon hearing the noises.

"The window!" Tezuka shouted.

"The condom!" Fuji shouted.

Oishi smacked Tezuka and Fuji with a hammer that came out from nowhere and scolded them, "Stupid! Look at your children first!"

"INCEST! INCEST!" Eiji chanted.

"Oishi! Fix the window!" Tezuka ordered.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"What did you do to the condom?" Fuji mourned.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"Think of your children you useless parents!" Oishi scolded.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

Sakuno sat up, stared at the scene and blinked innocently.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"But Oishi, me and Sakuno were only playing." Ryoma explained.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"Ryoma probably tripped that's why they're in that position. My condom." Fuji concluded and was still mourning for his condom.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"You worry too much maid." Tezuka's glasses beamed.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"But Echizen said sex!"

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"It was a game called secs."

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"It isn't a game!"

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"It isn't? It's spelled S-E-C-S, secs."

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"Oh, I didn't know there was a game called like that. I misunderstood, sorry." Oishi apologized. Oh how wrong Oishi can be.

"INCEST! INCEST!"

"SHUT UP!" Ryoma, Tezuka, Oishi, and Fuji shouted at Eiji who kept shouting incest. Eiji sniffed and fake cried then all became silent for a second.

"YURI! YURI! YAOI! YAOI!" Eiji broke the silence by spouting nonsense. Oishi hitted Eiji with an air freshener can to keep him quiet and it worked since Eiji fell unconscious.

"Uhh, the police?" Fuji suggested.

"Right." Tezuka agreed.

**END **

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><p><strong>AN: Sorry for the randomness! Like my other story entitled Seigaku Kindergarten, this story is also made for my friends a long time ago with me and my friends as the characters. I was the one acting Eiji's character since I have a certain fetish for incest but not incest in real life! Maybe... Anyway, I made a sequel for the original version of this and may make it into a fanfic like this one. It's gonna be called "Eiji's Adventure in Jail!". Look forward to it~ RxR!**


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